One of the key elements of every healthy relationship is appreciation. Especially in a long-term relationship, it is all too easy to take our partners for granted, forgetting the tremendous positive impact they have on our lives.

Of course, we all feel appreciation for our romantic partners. But can your partner feel that appreciation? All too often, the answer is no.

Luckily, you can change this. Even simply saying, “I appreciate you” or “Thank you, that means a lot to me” can do a world of good for your romantic relationship. Often, though, the best way to convey sincere gratitude is through your actions.

With that in mind, here are four unique ways you can let your partner know you appreciate them.

1. Tell Your Family and Friends

Speak highly of your partner to family and friends, and let them know how happy you are to be with him or her. You will be surprised how quickly your words of appreciation find their way back to your partner.

Though direct appreciation is always welcome, it’s wonderful to hear that someone is speaking well of us when we aren’t around.

2. Spend Time Reminiscing Together

Take your partner on a date to a restaurant or coffee shop. While you’re there, surprise them with photographs of your best memories together. If you don’t have any pictures, take them to a special place in your shared history—like the restaurant where you had your first date, or the park where you first kissed.

The important thing is to get the nostalgia ball rolling. As you reminisce together, use the opportunity to express any appreciative thoughts you might have missed the first time around. You might say something like, “I never told you, but I felt so happy to be with you at that moment.”

3. Ease their Stressful Schedule

When your partner is overwhelmed with work or other obligations, you can show your appreciation by running some errands for them or doing chores your partner normally takes care of. When we’re stressed, a moment to relax and unwind can be the best gift of all.

4. Cross Something off Your “Relationship Bucket List”

Most couples have a few plans that they always talk about, but never follow through on—a sort of “relationship bucket list.” Maybe there’s a restaurant you always talk about trying, or a day trip that never ends up happening.

Surprise your partner by planning an item on this list. This lets them know that you value shared experiences with them. It also lets your partner know want your relationship to continue to grow in new, exciting ways.

Even the happiest, most appreciative relationships have room to grow. A Delaware psychologist can help. Deepen the connection between you and your partner by attending one of my workshops, seminars, or therapy sessions.

Seeing a Delaware marriage therapist might not be the first thing on your mind when you and your partner have your first child together, and that’s very understandable. Suddenly the new addition to your family is at the forefront of your thoughts, and you may feel like you don’t have any time or energy left to focus on your relationship.

However, even if you don’t want to see a marriage counselor, you should make an extra effort to focus on your relationship after your first child. Relationship issues can quickly escalate when partners are sleep deprived, trying to navigate parenthood, and attempting to figure out their new role in the family.

Delaware Marriage Therapist Offers Tips for Couples Expecting Their First Child

Figure out how to divide domestic duties. There’s no getting around it—there will be a lot more household duties once you welcome a baby into your family. Figuring out who’s going to do things like clean up the kitchen, change diapers, or get up with the baby in the middle of the night can be a huge source of contention, so head off this problem by sitting down with your partner ahead of time and discussing how you’ll divide tasks. It may work best for you to trade off tasks on a daily or weekly basis, so one person does not get stuck doing the same things all the time.

Discuss logistics. Sure, it’s not the most romantic activity, but you and your partner need to discuss the practical implications of having your first child rather than just playing it by ear. Discuss whether one parent is going to take some time off from work, how much time they will take off, and what that will mean for the family’s income. As a Delaware marriage therapist, I know that stressing out over money is a huge source of relationship issues, but having a plan in place can help ease anxieties.

Plan for date nights. Before you have your first child, you may take alone time with your partner for granted. However, once the new baby arrives, you may inadvertently neglect your significant other. This can lead to feelings of rejection, which can turn into bigger relationship issues, so you need to make an extra effort to spend time with your partner. Plan to get a babysitter every so often so that you can spend time together and remember what you love about one another.

Learn to be flexible. As much as I’ve advocated planning ahead, there’s only so much a Delaware marriage therapist—or anyone—can prepare you for. Having a child for the first time will be accompanied by plenty of surprises. You may find that the baby doesn’t want to nap on the schedule you’ve set up, or that there are new domestic duties that you never even anticipated. Be prepared to learn alongside your partner as you raise your child.